Last time I flew, I read a book one way and knitted the other way. I survived fine without a screen or wifi.

Given that Adam Silver just bragged about not giving into China, I’m not going rule out the Chinese being behind this.

Translation: “We’re not going to be very good, so Zion’s going to sit until all of the early season tickets that were sold already just to see Zion are used, then he will debut so we can sell some more.”

This is an amazing gift from the po-po that the shitass did nothing to deserve. (All drunk drivers are shitasses.) If they got his speed, he’d be looking at a felony.

Your lede is bad and you should feel bad. Frankly the only gift in this is that his wreck affected no one other than himself. 

Drunk driving is one of the few criminal charges that's pretty black and white. You're a shitbag if you choose to drink and drive. 

It’s kind of like when Adrian Peterson got the shitty gift of a league suspension despite having survived his son’s disobedience.

Seriously. Rethink the fucking lede of this story. Dude’s “gift” was not dying from making such a shitty, irresponsible fucking decision.

I’m shocked that somebody in Trump’s orbit would stiff somebody on payments.

What about Tim Hardaway? He fit the star player/total asshole profile perfectly?

At the time, Parnas told the Miami Herald he had stopped paying because the team wasn’t living up to its end of an agreement that included a verbal promise to have a player hand him a signed team basketball at center court during halftime of a game in 2000.

Fortunately for Parnas, a highly-placed U.S. official has asked his personal lawyer to look into the whereabouts of the signed ball, which, for reasons unknown, many people are saying may be in Ukraine.

Could not agree more. Guy is a star. I just hope his style doesn’t catch up with him too soon, because he should be a big deal for a long, long time. 

It’s also fairly concerning that Taylor Twellman would watch said NK vs. USMNT match voluntarily

I’ll give you an Incheon this, because I think you’re just Busan our balls.

So what you’re saying is that there were no Seouls in attendance?

Look, there are certain tortures even NK would not impose on their own people.

I guess we’ll have to take their word for it that Kim Jong Un scored 10 goals, 5 touchdowns, 8 homeruns and 15 wickets.

Hey Luis, I’ve got a great money-saving idea! You can re-use this article next year when the Chargers open their new stadium.

Silent Violent Haze is also the name of the new Ben and Jerry’s flavor specifically marketed at the lactose intolerant.