Don’t you want to see his business card? I’m sure it’s made of pure gold. Now let him tell you about the genius of Huey Lewis.

I like that I’m still in the grays. It reminds me that as a man, I’m a visitor on this site, and my ideas have to earn their way into the light, unlike so many men’s ideas that are automatically given weight.

Has Trump or anyone in his cabal expressed any displeasure at being so frequently labeled as Nazis? They complain about how their stupid words are reported accurately, they complain about how their make-believe stories weren’t covered by the media, but they don’t complain that they’re being called Nazis every day by…

Yeah, you don’t use the word “massacre” when someone off his meds shoots his boss before turning the gun on himself. “Massacre” is a word reserved for absolute bloodbaths, scenes of such horror that they echo through the ages.

The members of the Fascist Forever Party quietly chuckle and say to themselves, “Can’t be doing this stuff in the open just yet, kids. Wait just a bit longer.”

“We can’t be doing this shit in the open yet, kids, we haven’t made Fuhrer Trump president-for-life just yet.”

Soon to be replaced by a “Actually don’t touch the slops, we might want those, too” economy.

Remember to use the new name, the Fascist Forever Party.

It’s the “Fascism Forever” Party now. They’ve rebranded.

I didn’t understand Dubya’s supporters. I questioned McCain supporters. I disagreed strongly with Romney supporters.

I probably share more Lifehacker stories with my circle than all other sites combined. You’ve helped to make my life better. Job well done, and best of luck in your future endeavors.

My wife is telling me I can’t use the internet anymore. Something about flirting with strange men. I don’t know what she’s talking about, I thought we were arguing! There’s a difference between arguing and making hot, hot overtures, right? For instance, Donald Trump doesn’t really want to kiss the leaders of Mexico…

So .... was Twitter afraid that the real-real Frederick Douglass was going to sue if they didn’t take action? I don’t get it.

people with a severe mental illness who can’t hold any kind of job or make any decisions about their affairs

Steve Bannon is always there, lurking in a dusty, dark corner, drinking the blood of newborn infants and yammering incoherently about the imminent return of Nyarlathotep, C’thulu and Yog-Sothoth just before he climbs up the wall and hides in his Cave of Eternal Madness.

I dunno, I’m not sure you’re manning properly here. I need to inspect your man card (totally not a gay euphemism, I promise).

I remember hearing how easy it would be to pacify Iraq in 2003. Are people’s memories really so short?

You used a lot of words when you could’ve just said you don’t like black people.

Yes, in fact, I remember Sotomayor’s hearings being fairly adversarial. So Mr. Fascism Forever is going to have to face the music, if he doesn’t just up and run away before it comes to that.

All nocturnal emissions must be preserved, too. All men will need to wear special “collection diapers” while sleeping so that no sperm are lost.