To be fair, that describes a whole lot of politicians these days. 

I genuinely laughed, like for-real laughed when I finally found her. 

The Yuuzon Vhong have always struck me as some kind of weird cross-over from some other fictional universe. They don’t seem like a part of that universe at all.

I feel bad for a lot of traditional watch manufacturers right now. Citizen makes good watches, but smartwatches aren’t watches, they are tiny tablet computers that happen to fit on your wrist.

NGL, I loved the fuck out of mine too. You must be the other guy who bought one. 

No, I’m pointing out that it’s a mandate. You have to buy it. But you can’t.

Laughs in unwalkable-cities-American. Laughs in Houston-can’t-be-driven-across-in-one-hour-at-85-mph.

You know, I never realized it, but you are right.

“New Rule: Your religious beliefs do not apply to me.”

That proverbial cow’s been giving milk for so long, they’ll never get off the teat.

Or the sequel to “Dick in a box”. 

The government has a legal mandatory requirement to citizens to purchase a for-profit product but corporations don’t have a legal requirement to provide it.

It’s a one-off. 

My wife, easily influenced by social media FOMO: “I really want a Peloton, can we get one PWEASSSSSE? I really really want to get into it.”

Sony:

You can’t fool me, Jez; that’s just Trump in a wig.

TIL not to leave my swiss army knife in the center console in case I get pulled over. 

I love how the white utility truck doesn’t even have a front axle. That gave me a nice little internal chuckle. 

No, no, no.