No, it's a related story.... Sad!

If he walks far enough in any direction, eventually he’ll find a McDonald’s.

How corrupt do you have to be, to get the gerrymandered State of NC, to investigate you for voter fraud? That's Adrian Peterson telling someone their hit their kids too much.

The double-shot! Illegal and unconstitutional! Trump does less winning than the Washington Generals (not the ones in the administration, although they're not winning - I mean the ones who play the Globetrotters).

For $16,000 a job, State would do better to hire people at minimum wage to do, anything 

The Old Man, Fred Trump was Paulie. Don Sr is Fredo. Don Jr is like Fredo Jr, he's like a fuzzy photocopy of a fuzzy photocopy.

I can also see a race to the bottom, where Northwestern is told to drastically cut tuition or they're out of the Big not-10-anymore.

May I suggest "Benevolent Dictator" for your third?

And it needs some misspeeled wurds with Random kaputiZation.

I am pleasantly surprised by this.

I agree with you, but I also think he should have been way more aware of his word choices, since there are many Arabs who want to push the Israelis into the sea.

While true, it doesn't make the current Israeli policies right either. 

I thought that's what his son in law was supposed to do. 

The team is kinda a giveaway on the racism.

VP is vacant. But, it means Mitch McConnell would succeed Pelosi.

I'm not a fan of Pelosi, but I've been hoping that she ends up President because: Trump is awful; Pence may be worse; it'd make a lot of conservative ghouls spontaneously combust. 

We wish!

Cohen is like a non-fatal, chronic health condition that just occasionally flares up. Like herpes.

Ben also pretty much just questions his receivers. He’s always defended his line (including the horrible one they won a Superbowl with), won’t complain about Conners fumbles, and never questions the defense (which, didn’t lose the Denver game, but they’ve been pretty awful at times this year). I’m guessing Ben figures…

The dumbest of our citizens....himself and his kids.