“Robert E. Lee” came in second.

best quote from one of the mechanics I used to work with:

“TJ McConnell”: Please admit me to your area. I play for the 76ers

There is no clutch on a motorcycle! You only have two pedals - one for gear shifting and one for brakes. There is no room left for clutch! /s

Oh no. Now that marriage may not work out.

I dnt play them games

Seriously. Wonderful, naturally-aspirated engine, (relatively) reasonable maintenance costs for an M-car, 6-speed only, and it just has this subtle, badass look to it. It’s like the classy gentleman of performance cars, and BMW hasn’t made anything like it every since. The E60 M5 was ugly and had loads of problems…

I think we just figured out where all those unused copies of Nickelback’s last CD went.

All guns, no butter.

Can I just say, that as a BMW driver who always - ALWAYS - uses his turn signal, I weep a little bit inside when I read these comments.

Why do I love my car?

Be warned, if I walk out to someone fucking with my car, regardless of your “good intentions,” I’m pants-ing you and requiring you to do the walk of shame without pants, aka “The Doug.”

The perps were apprehended, queso closed.

Because they don’t like being at the service department every week?

This is why pets should be banned from airplanes. Service animals aside, your pooch doesn't trump my right to breathe.

I can’t buy the new dodge neon?

RON PAUL 2012!!

This:

Westfield Sei, for men who want handjobs from women they’ve just paid

I hear those things are awfully loud.