Everything MUST be everything to everyone everywhere at all times.

You know what? Fuck you. I'm white and I stay home with my child because we live below the poverty line, and we can't afford childcare. I'm happy to stay home, but let us not perpetuate the myth that all stay at home moms are privileged. Also, to reiterate, fuck you.

It would be less funny but more informative* if you simply wrote a story that explained exactly what happened. By the time I got done mentally subtracting all the crap you made up, I couldn't be sure what was true anymore. And your snide commentary about the "stalking" charge, coupled with a complete lack of interest…

My beloved kitty that passed away last year used to meow furiously at the living room door if I had accidentally locked her out in the kitchen while I was playing piano. She would sit on the bench and purr while I was playing, and she would meow with me if I was singing. And tears.

The cats tried to kill the metal. But they failed as they were stricken down to the ground!

So Obama's America is one in which your pay should automatically be bumped up if you are female or have black skin or wear a sombrero. The victim mentality continues and the entitled will demand what they haven't earned.

And why was that rifle invented in the first place? To kill something. She's not saying you can't use them to not kill, but don't act like that's not the reason we have them in the first place.

Ban knives now! That's the only answer to our out-of-control knife culture.

I hate it when actors ... act... instead of being paragons of our virtues! How dare they!

I wonder whose song they ripped off.

Yeah, it's so great because no one ever discussed sex-positivity before Beyoncé—Mrs. Carter—thought of it first. Truly she is the Messiah.

Fuck democracy, amirite? Dictatorships are great as long as you agree with the dictator and what he or she is dictating.

Obama is only now done with Selfies??? What about the selfie mess as Nelson Mandela's funeral. He should have been done with selfies then. Scapegoating Ortiz and Samsung is lazy.

most people have a false sense of entitlement to free shit. i download things illegally all the time, but i don't go and curse thepiratebay when the movie isn't of the highest quality. i miss the days when twitter wasn't an outlet for the retarded

Isn't there a joke here about how private companies aren't really better at websites than the government? something like #freemarketfail or something?

I don't know:

Well once it was no longer deemed a planet I heard property values took a real dive.

This is so dumb.... I love it.

You realize that is getting fucking old, right?