“I took that as an opportunity to sketch other drivers and their cars.”

Well la-di-da, Professor Einstein can read everybody!

My grandparents used to roll up the windows and smoke like Italian gangsters on every trip. I swear to god I’d be three inches taller today if it wasnt for them.

“Divorce text, impressive”

And chlamydia.

“Antetokounmpo’s in the jungle...getting stronger”

We both have a type.

You are correct Sir!! I used to sell shoes. They are like a murder of crows picking at fresh road kill.

You sound very confused.

I send mine home with a sense of regret and a desire for celibacy

“Your face is my case”

No, its fighting for fame, money, respect and prestige. All strong enough motivators to provoke aggressiveness.

That and a reaction to the swing set lube.

Is THAT what that burning sensation was?

You call yourself an editor with that complete lack of grammar?

I send my one nighters home with a sense that their lives have become very small and a burning desire for religious fulfillment.

Wow, do you have a computer program that generates your responses? You sound like an automated cable company recording.

The word “hero” has basically been rendered meaningless on Jezebel.

At least his girlfriend can make him laugh.