“Well, I have sex with my daughter. But usually before dinner so God doesnt care.”

The difference is Bush is not a bad person on a human level. Hes a decent person who never should have been president and made some awful decisions.

Im glad he was not successful.

“Thank fucking God.”

God, I hope no kids are listening.

A few moments of discomfort allowed me entree’ to a social group that made it ten times more likely for girls to fellate me.

“We are sending 12 invisible Wonder Woman jets to fight the limeys because Russia is awesome.”

 So that explains why the t-shirt I ordered never showed up.

Meh.

“Whats an NFL?”

I grew up in West Texas and the worst I got was the upperclassmen would get us shitfaced then take us out on a cold ass night and make us get butt nekkid and lay down in an icy muddy stream.

We have to think of the “other” victims here.

“...shouted “Get him!” and held the 16-year-old victim face down on a bed while sodomizing him with the threaded end of a carbon-dioxide tank.”

I thought she was Mexican...?

“...including coke bottles, deodorant bottles, steel pipes, baseball bats and broom sticks.”

Music does kinda suck now.

“Road to Perdition”. Nice.

It depends, did you order a caterer?

wut