dwaynescarpetmatchesthedrapes
dwaynescarpetmatchesthedrapes
dwaynescarpetmatchesthedrapes

Good, I love guns.

I like the one about the teenagers who are making out in the car and they hear on the radio about how a killer has escaped from prison with hooks for hands and so they get scared and drive off and when they get home they find a hook hanging from the car door.

A) How long does it take to climb?

Doesnt see what all the fuss is about.

Wanted for questioning.

TSA will have to be hyper vigilant for dark skinned men from Riyadh claiming to be Amish.

Dude, anything to make soccer less boring should be applauded.

Or you could practice being better at soccer so people dont embarrass you so much.

Ironically Hillarys robot looks warmer than the real person.

Reminds me of the time my granny forgot to take her pills and kept calling the coffee machine “a dirty kraut”.

Youre Dwayneco’s new VP of marketing.

Rufus the Ship Dog christening the lawn.

Thanks Johnny Run Fast, now we all know how over paid you are.

Ramen-Omelette: Prepare chicken flavored Ramen and strain.

Why not?

“Have you ever tried to imagine what a building built from one half US Capitol, and one half Beijing’s Temple of Heaven would look like?”

Did you make a bet on how many times you could say “Brooklyn”?

Im sure he is banking on winning and not having to worry about it.

Ah the old “You knew I was a drunk when you hired me defense”.