What would have actually been funny is if Burgandy/Ferrel had waited for her to say something and replied, "That's a great story, now take off your top, Tits McGee!"

Well shit. Shut it down, and close it up. OyyBrent didn't think it was than funny.

Why would someone believe two thieves and a man who choked his wife? Haha.

Holy shit, a completion in Oakland.

I was a total misanthropist until last year. I thought that the world was a place where only the most ruthless and amoral people would ever find success. A lot had gone wrong in my life but not nearly as much as was about to. See, my birthday present from the universe last year was an extremely aggressive form of…

"Is that Jennifer Lawrence? I heard she got a haircut... I don't know about it. I just don't know..."

Are you even kidding me?

my'right

Ugh, if he's gonna rip off Marvin Gaye, can't his dad rip off Senior?

Ronald Reagan once punched a hole through a cow just so he could see who was coming up the road. TO RONALD REAGAN!!

No no no. Leave the gun, take the cannoli.

you are correct, sir!

[Touches envelope to forehead]

"(Ed McMahon was also there!)"

Gosh, if he truly wanted to know the answer, why didn't he just don a turban and cape and touch his head to the door?

Of course he didn't forbid any future jokes about it. The next week, Madonna concluded her performance of "Bad Girl" by shouting "Fight the real enemy!" and ripping up a picture of Joey Buttafuoco. It killed.

This gave me a Boehner.

Well, we have to eat SOMETHING.

Jerry Sandusky has the body of a 12 year old boy. Your move Skip