It still amazes me that an 8-bit processor has better clock management than Andy Reid.

Alternate headline from COMPETE:

“hello the owner of this phone Courtney. I am buying an iPad.”

Non story. The only reason she was spotted under a highway underpass was simply because she was trying to get an interview with Johnny Manziel.

“Video of Courtney Roland inside ambulance shortly after she was found in Galleria.”

Berry was confused. Usually when someone folds his arms and turns his back to him so he can’t see anything, that means its time to start taking the final exam in class.

Down to the waist or up to the waist? I’ll hang up and listen.

LaVar Ball makes good on wager, throws football clear over them mountains.

LaVar Ball Joins Alex Jones, Bill Walton In Monday Night Football Booth

Lavar Ball Only Looked At Tentacle Porn Because His Wife And Kids Didn’t Think It Existed

LaVar Ball Calls Heat Death of the Universe “Some Overrated Weak Ass Shit”

I think we’ve made a real breakthrough today.

I feel like this was your best-researched article in years.

it was not the game we needed but probably the game we deserved

So were they biased towards his grit or his scrappiness?

From: BelBillichick@realnewspaper.com

I’m going to add to this theory: what if Belichick is as salty as the ESPN gossip reports, and leaves the Patriots and Kraft/Brady?

Dear 8lb 6oz newborn infant Jesus, let me see this before i die.

I very much accept this theory. (One Pats beat guy DM’d me to offer the same theory.)

At least his wipers won’t stick to the windshield. #silverlining