On August 8th at 7:00 AM EST, Brian Ashcraft officially declared it a slow news day by writing an article about tattoos and an event that is four years away. It was also a desperate advertisement for his Japanese tattoo book.

weird, watched that clip a bunch and I didn't see him fondling a monster cock. you sure?

This dude gon’ get zika.

I dunno man, I think “observing rehabbing players” is another way of saying that this dude is beating off to A’s players.

Weird that Rio is ashamed of their long and storied history of robbing and raping/killing people. Read “Carioca Fletch” and you’ll find that a book written almost 30 years ago about the area is still relevant. Let’s be honest, assaulting and robbing people is to Brazil as apple pie is to America.

Old news Barry.

What makes you think she won’t be another empty chair? Hillary’s greatest achievement as president will be becoming the first female one. Outside of that she faces the same gridlock Obama has and I doubt she will be able to change or do much. I’m still voting for her but she's just going to be a much less interesting…

To be fair, perhaps if Hildawg actually, you know, showed up to the convention then she would have her face plastered all over the papers. Instead she did an awkward video conference call. And don't say she was unavailable; she was in New York, the convention is in Philly. She could have easily made it there. I don't…

You shut your fucking mouth about Gushers. They are the best.

wow dude you really wanna fuck this Kojima guy, huh?

Agreed. The dude is really far up his own ass. Here's hoping his Norman Reedus baby sex game sucks.

Gawker: Bitter and Never Happy With Anything

It was cool to hear his speech, but as a site trying to be a legitimate news source I wish you would’ve ruined it with the Casino Royal music.

It’s Cleveland, how can you expect anything else? Cleveland sucks.

How about just not being dicks and releasing the game to everyone?

“oh no, my shit astronaut logo and vague shitty looking game trailer that gives no clue as to what it will be or look like might get leaked.”

“There’s still a chance... Ben Roethlisberger could make an appearance.”

He's still having the worst season of his career and outside of the random donger, has been useless.

BTW, not even a Jets or Sanchize fan (they both suck) but how about writing an article about how AJ torpedoed the Gawker franchise by posting a sex tape that no one really cared about? Nice that you’re re-posting popular articles from back in the day, but let’s be honest. you will be out of a job because AJ posted…

Dope! As this site is sinking, why not re-post shit before you guys go completely under? This story really gained traction. Oh wait, no it didn't. Nice.