Yes. I’m irrationally angry about this. Cancel Joe Fucking Biden, not a dog, ffs. This is why I despise humans*.

This is the quality sports content I come to Jezebel for.

Yes! I still quote this to people on the regular.

I had to go looking for that because it sounds absolutely batshit. Apparently, it is the movie Witchery, and stars Linda Blair and David Hasselhoff. I have added it to my watchlist.

Elephants are smarter than the average human though. They are also more empathetic, and a hell of a lot more adorable than the average human too.

Nope, definitely not OK.

Right? Every time I hear someone call her pretty, I’m “Are we all looking at the same face?” I mean, if you’re going to pay for your features, pick better ones. And smaller teeth. Those chompers are almost as ridiculously oversized as her fake tits.

I believe their point is to prove to us that they are a gigantic bootlicking cocknob.

Sweet baby Jesus, are you an insufferable prig. I don’t just feel sorry for your “employees,” I now also feel sorry for your family.

I also think you’re this angry with my observation because it’s not the first time someone has called you an asshole.

Bless your heart.

I wasn’t trying to be “smart, witty or amusing,” I was just stating a fact. Also, you are clearly none of those things either.

You’re an asshole and I feel sorry for your employees.

Sweet Christ, no.

Lee Pace definitely needs to happen. Also, I miss Pushing Daisies.

Apropos of nothing, but why do rich celebrities always seem to have the most shit tattoos?

Thank you! Don’t get me wrong, I love LWT and John Oliver, but erasing Sam Bee just to make a point that late night is dominated by mostly mediocre white men was a shit thing to do. You don’t have to leave her off the list because any of us with a working brain can still see it’s a medium dominated by mostly mediocre w…

It’s not a hard job though, and being a cop isn’t even in the top ten most dangerous and hazardous jobs in the U.S. There’s currently between 750,000 - 850,000 sworn officers on duty here.

I had my IUD replaced on Drumpf’s “Inauguration Day.” I figured it was already going to be a shit day so I might as well do something unpleasant, and I’ll never forget the date when it comes time to replace it again.

That’s what happens when Kinja can’t be arsed to show you all the comments.