*chef kiss*

I’m going to tweet “bee stuff burden” every hour on the hour now

Between Barstool getting slapped and Nick Foles becoming a Jaguar it’s been an interesting week for three-legged sports figures.

“Mike Ogren” sounds like a rejected name from a Chris Farley skit about eating paint chips.

That sounds about white (cubed)

Pepperidge Farm remembers?

maybe they only let the tall ones fuck and the little ones get put in the soup

Dude that Marquis is dope as all hell.

I learned English watching Doug Funny!

E Fresh

You made it approximately 2:20 longer than I did. I instantly close youtube videos whenever I hear “it’s your boy...” 

And it looks like they did very little to differentiate from the MB generic steering wheel.

So what you’re saying is that it is not an affront to God to consume poop on Fridays during Lent?

Does she have sisters named Hemi-Leigh and Semi-Leigh?

I was going to go with the head of security on Naboo, but I see what you’re saying.

Ted Cruz grew real human beard

I’m deriving so much utility from calling him out for being a douche canoe.

“The anti-PC police can’t even complain about this one.”

That’s my fucking son you’re talking about, bud.

I think you mean “Servant of Grandfather Nurgle.”