Jose Mourinho should just coach all of the teams in the Premiership at once.

My son has also shown a fantastic ability to flop and fake injury when playing with his friends or siblings, and at the age of four! I’m assuming his professional soccer contract is currently being couriered to my house?

We don’t always understand your point. We think we do, but it isn’t always 100% clear...

Has Kinja become sentient? Is it trolling us?

Hyperbole. However, it is not an exaggeration to say that VW sold consumers a product they were not legally allowed to sell, then was forced by the government to offer them a settlement for those products, which is a fairly significant annoyance and inconvenience for its customers. The individuals who say “I still…

That is an entirely fair point.

Completely different. You get a speeding ticket for breaking a rule so paying in pennies is being an ass for being caught breaking a rule. In this case, he bought a car, with the full intention of paying for it and enjoying it, and was completely screwed over by the manufacturer. What rule did he break?

No, you’re not losing sleep over it because you’ve decided making fun of an entire nation is acceptable to you. Consider how folks with Polish origin react to those jokes though, particularly in the United States. Respect for people applies to everyone, not just the groups you decide to apply it to.

...

For $12,450 I could buy 12,450 pictures of George Washington. Not as rare as this, but probably a better purchase.

Can’t be sure unless you nuke it from orbit.

This guy sounds like a virgin, by choice of course - he just doesn’t have the time to deal with all the women (or men) who want to bed him.

Goes to show - don’t f*** with a supremely-loyal enthusiast base. Love turns to hate much more quickly than “meh” does.

Better than being an inverted penis...

Do they have mandatory tire pressure checking in California?

I’m also primarily a Jalopnik reader, however I appreciate the cross-links to articles like these. Sometimes not a bad idea to expand your knowledge base and gain an appreciation for issues that are not really being covered by the mainstream media. Also, this seems generally more important than the stuff we read about…

Jeff Gordon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ensure that emails from the company’s domain name are on your permitted sender list (or whatever you call it) to ensure that an email from hr@whatevercompany.com doesn’t otherwise get missed.

All it takes is one failed burnout from a Cars and Coffee.