My husband keeps begging me to grow it out because "it's so soft and cuuuuute.".

I get told I look like a prepubescent boy all the time. It's just as hurtful as being told you are heavy.

Holler!

Truth. In all honesty, my brain was probably frying from the fever, but it scared the Hades out of me.

Goddamn protestants making angry haints.

I got one for y'all. I was raised by ABA Baptists in Central Louisiana. As charming as stories about eternal hell fire and razing the cities of the plain are, I left the faith as soon as I had sentient thought in my little head. That being said, I am not generally swayed by the supernatural, but this one got me.

Same here. Good old Baptists telling little girls they're going to hell to burn in a lake of eternal fire and be separated from everything they love forevvver. Also, Yoga=witchcraft! Powerrangers=Idolatry! Feminists=witches! GOOD WIVES SUBMIT YE TO YOUR HUSBANDS. Shit messes you up. Not a morning goes by when I'm not…

Thank you. Calmly answering with facts. Thank you.

1. Indie rock is dummmb. Listen to your 14-year-old self and stick with Slayer.

COTD +1

Also, Hilary Clinton is busily flying her ass all over creation in order to secure relations with the fucking Middle East and Israel. Sarah Palin is getting her nails did and applying $80 facial cream. Give me a break. Powerful is sexy. Striving for a change is sexy. Speaking one's mind is sexy. Foreign…

Give me a goddamn break. Men have been shouting that from every corner of the earth for centuries. You want a tighter fit? I'm pretty sure you can adjust your grip.

Fo Sho. +1

At least the cops investigated. In Texas, if you are raped and there is ANY alcohol involved, detective won't investigate because it'll screw up their conviction numbers. The defense here in Perryland is: "WELL HER WAS DRANKING AND SHE WANTED IT BECAUSE SHE HAD SECKS BEFORE IN HER LIFE SLUTSLUTSLUT. Murrica."

Try New Orleans. There's a lot of "HEY HEY HEY YOU GIRL, THAT'S MY BIKE, COME OVER HERE." As well as no one ever stopping at stops signs, and everyone parking in the bike lanes. It's scury.

No one would throw away a whole cigarette. Ever.

Truth. I've caught more than one snacking on their babies.

Yes ma'am. We sure will. That's such a beautiful way to put it. We are tough folk and we know a party when we see one.