I know exactly how Andrew Luck feels. I mean, I don’t have a degree from Stanford or a bunch of athletic ability or millions of dollars or a super-high IQ. But I have been booed by people in Indianapolis. And my boss does a lot of drugs.

It is not a sport for weak men. He never should have taken all that money if he knew he was just going to run away from the sport, with his tail between his legs, because he got a couple of booboos. Football is for real MEN and not these entitled CHILDREN who want their paychecks without giving it everything they…

Barry is Kramer

Yes.

Wow, a chance to compare myself to a celebrity, I wonder what I will bring up.

Depends on how stinky  

I have, for the last eight months or so, been unhappily using one-ply TP that I accidentally bought a case of. So I am an expert. Fold, fold, fold.

That's a little extreme, don't you think, Taco?

Well if that’s not proof that QBR is an extremely important and useful statistic, I don’t know what is. 

As always, never trust a man wearing transition lenses.

And to think this is one of your nicer posts.

Dave Portnoy has a Kinja?

Still better than you, though.

“You need a letter from your local sheriff to get permission to learn to read in North Carolina.”

Hey man, if I wanted to talk about something that sucks that’s rife with 90's nostalgia and has chugged along on an unearned reputation for 25 years, I’d go over to/ r/pearljam

The Panthers are the most McMansiony of all the newer NFL teams. There’s a flashy surface value to them that covers up cheap drywall, a leaky roof, and faulty plumbing that always need fixing every couple years. They have the personality of a subdivision called Gridiron Grotto where there’s an artificial lake that is…

*Marianne Williamson promises to publicly audit all four sports leagues*

Never forget:

“Truly the Cardinal Way has become the way of dishonor.”

In true Dead Letters fashion, the caller ended his rant, “And you better believe I’m calling with a Samsung Galaxy S8+ on Verizon, motherfuckers.”