How many inches do you think that thing is fully erect?

Man, whoever takes over in Chicago is really going to have to take the flower by the thorns.

This is an acceptable excuse, that airport does make one stupid

It’s more than just “Hickory” and “Cherokee,” it’s also “Pass” and “County line.” All of them together does sound quite Old-Timey-Western!

If they’d have caulked the stagecoach to float it would have taken longer but there’s a good chance those two officers would be alive today. And think, with two more officers they could easily carry 100lbs of meat back to the station.

And that guy is a Fjord Explorer!  Waka waka waka.

holy shit

You think Torts is pissed, how about Jack Johnson’s parents who now have to buy 4 houses in Pittsburgh!

Stephan: Legion’s hottest episode has everything. Body dysmorphia, Aubrey Plaza, time travel orbs, astral plane dance fighting, Basket heads, robot women with mustaches, cat body swapping, waffle boats.

She really dropped the ball by not yelling out “Later Gator!” as she walked off.

Maybe they hired him because of the Staph he would bring with?

My god, that’s something I want to hear now. A Scalzi book read by Dawson would be tons of fun.

The Portnoy system just doesn’t have the same success rate though.

A nasty collision with a Willy is usually cause for a Yoan.

Should have watched The Incredibles and known the perils of a cape.

His lawyer is even trying to get him off on this one too!

Classic Deadspin shitty fact checking.