For us oldtimers: Now that y’all are at the helm of the good ship Jalopnik, who would you bring back for a reunion concert, going all the way back to the start of the site?

How can you afford such great longform journalism (I’m lookin at you, Felton) and also Fancy Kristen’s exorbitant champagne expensing?

Well, hopefully wherever it goes, there’s an atmosphere to crash into.

I see you, too, have the folder of early 2000s poster memes.

It’s a performance mod.

Why you gotta be like this?

clearly everybody knows what they have.

“For now at least”

dat valve area, bro.

It’s not, though. 4 stroke.

here I thought you were gonna complain about flight dynamics, but yea, I agree. for now at least, designing a single point of failure into the launch and business strategy seems... unwise.

if you check the back seats, you’ll find it’s a repository for more than just souls.

Oh, it’s real. And it’s SPECTACULAR.

(they’re definitely not “grounded to the ground”)

Looking forward to that reboot of the Disney classic:

9:27

It’s “really guy”, singular.

The best shitposts speak to the secrets deep inside us all...

Miata
Isn’t
Actually
The
Answer

Arteon is evolving into PHAETON!