Have you seen "Pearl Harbor?"

Hey Death, just fucking stop it already! If you're so desperate for souls, can't you take the likes of Bill Cosby, Jared Fogle, or Michael Bay? Why must you feed on the people we all like?

It's the podcast no one's listening to! Seriously, I couldn't avoid people telling me to listen to the first season. Now I can't find a single one who is actually listening to the current one.

It's finally time for Hellcow to shine!

Well, fuck. Such an innovative, one-of-a-kind talent. He worked in so many styles, and mastered them all. A visionary and a pioneer. R.I.P., Starman.

I specifically set up a news alert feed to send me stories that involve the terms "Beyonce" and "tag team." This story is not what I was hoping for.

That's a lot of insufferability to fit into just 2 more seasons.

I think the expression on Apocalypse's face in the photo above sums up how I feel about the X-Men film series these days.

Those Butabi brothers sketches were some of the lamest to ever air in the history of SNL. It was a classic no-joke premise that barely even made any sense. These sketches make the Target Lady look like high art.

Shit, the guys from Husker Du and Motley Crue better get a check-up, stat.

Fuck you, death. I'm off to listen to "No Sleep 'til Hammersmith" now.

If this was truly a Miss Universe pageant, then I think we can all agree that Miss Neptune should have won.

Character development, alas, does not appear to be a power of the force. By the end of the film, I still knew very little about any of the new characters. Even Lucas, by his weak screenwriting standards, managed to do a little better job of that. I'd love it if someone could figure out how much of the film's run…

My takeaway from this list? 2015 was not a great year for movies.

It's about fucking time Cheap Trick got in. They're one of the greatest live bands of all time (even today), their first three albums represent one of the best string of consecutive albums in rock history (four, if you count "Live at Budokan"), and they are just plain cool motherfuckers. They better let Bun E.…

So glad to see Mr. Robot get some love.

They're the original odd couple!

Another thing Freddie Mercury doesn't like—wearing shirts with his neckties.

I'm guessing that even though she's a hologram, Letterman still tried to creepily flirt with her.

They'll have to pry these garden shears from my cold, dead hands.