I wish they had shown him with an increasing amount of snow accumulating on his person because he hadn’t moved all episode. Sometime next episode the camera should pan to a vaguely person-in-a-wheelchair shaped pile of snow in the middle of the courtyard.

A White Flyer?

Stories like this actually terrify me, because it’s much easier for me to believe that all of this immigration bullshit is borne of a cynicism among the GOP and the Trump administration, making this out to be a crisis when they’re well aware that it isn’t, simply to scare old white people into voting for them.

I like basketball

And somehow that same government executes flawless cover-ups of 9-11, chemtrails, and alien encounters. :/

I am running for the Democratic Party nomination for President of the United States of America. My platform is focused around expanding the McDonald’s $1/2/3 menu, free meme education for seniors, and banning the Flo Progressive Insurance commercials from the television airwaves.

Can’t take credit for that one. You can thank the brain geniuses at Fox News and their “3 Mexican Countries” graphic for that…

The Trump administration’s arguments against the deal were, characteristically, a lot harder to parse

At least not on the side we chose.

“Kid. Come on. I’m doing a live show over here. Don’t shit on my segment. If I lose this job, I gotta go work at the White House.” 

He’s doing this because he is counting on the Democrats never having power in the Senate again (esp. at the same time there is a Democratic president). That is what worries me most. He is calculating that Democrats will never get to reciprocate these power grabs because they’ll never have the chance.

Correction, we’re mad because we know the Dems WOULDN’T do this if given the chance, which they absolutely should. 

On the bright side, this gave Susan Collins a chance to reestablish her “principled moderate” persona by wringing her hands while expressing her deep concern and voting against it. Of course also doing so secure in the knowledge it wouldn’t make a difference because it already had the votes to pass.

Another anecdote from the book is that the caddies at one of the clubs Trump belonged to grew so accustomed to him kicking his ball onto fairways that they nicknamed him “Pele.”

Unacceptable lack of Mark Hamill in there.

Yes! Choose a centrist, pair them with a plate of reduced-sodium saltines as VP, and just ride that wave to a sure-fire victory.

I understand wanting to see it in a quieter, less crowded theater but I think sometimes seeing an event movie like this in a jam-packed theater adds to the excitement.

One big reason people going to the opening weekend is to avoid spoilers. 

Joe Biden is not getting my primary vote if he runs.

They should give DeVos good seats for the Javelin throw. Like really, really good seats.