i somehow did not see that coming..... well played

Let’s decode this:

gesundheit

God, such an amateur

United: What are you going to do? Drive across the country?

Call me crazy, but I kinda wish more CEOs would just give it to me straight like that.

Let’s have a bit of fun and compare my bathroom to the one on a Boeing Business Jet

And raptor

The ground up remains of his corpse, sealed into handy to display disks, auctioned off to the highest bidder.

... said Penny Lorenzen, a passenger on the flight. “It’s amazing to me how calm everybody stayed. Angels were watching out for us.”

The most surprising bit of news in this article? The fact that individual state troopers have their own public Twitter accounts.

Maybe he needed TP for his bunghole!

Postmortem sale of dessicated remains. DS9 episode number something something.

I’m pretty sure that he’s from Florida

I’m pretty sure Raptor pilots love this shit.

I just don’t understand what it is about planes that makes people crazy. is it really so hard to check a bag, put stuff in the overhead, keep your seat upright, pretend to listen to the flight attendants, and sit quietly in your seat for a couple hours without starting a fight, clipping your toenails, doing yoga, or…

Thank goodness for duct tape!

“It’s amazing to me how calm everybody stayed. Angels were watching out for us.” No they weren’t.

In one of the ducts, of course.