I fucking love that Deadspin has fascinating and well-written articles like these, where when you read the headline you momentarily wonder if it’s just a randomly generated string of words, and then you realize that no, there really were two Kentucky farmers that became kings of croquet.

You totally know he farted on the goalie after that score.

When you’re used to fighting 10 Pirates at once, one Schwarber isn’t really much of a meal. Consider yourself spared Kyle

He’s a left handed relief pitcher, he’ll still be pitching when today’s unborn grandchildren get to be old enough to care to watch baseball

The fucking was IN THE ROOM THE ENTIRE TIME!

I love me a dose of morning salt.

What if they ARE fucking? What if clothed, non-penetrative, exhibitionism over ice is just their kink?

evidently having taken his eight-game suspension to heart.

Tessa has Virtue but Scott wants Moir.

Fuck man! I’m tired of this shit! You know what the worst thing about Trump? Trump loves to NOT know. Nothing makes Trump happier than not knowin’ the answer to your question.

Vázquez then told police that he and the victim had “sex but not really,” per the court record.

We’ve all been there

Disclaimer: My brother sent me this. I did not make it myself 

In Gladwell’s defense, the Penn State coaching staff and administration probably spent more than 10,000 hours raping children and ignoring it, so he’d have to reject the entire premise of one of his own books if he didn’t recognize their expertise in the field.

It’s not Joe Pa’s fault — after spending 10,000 hours ignoring the issue, he had become so good at it as to be second nature.

Over under on whether this will be the haughty dipshit take of this week's Jamboroo. There's a good chance I'd say.

Cam has taken a beating behind bad offensive lines for as long as I can remember. I would love to see if he’s been hit the most out of any QB since coming into the league nearly 10 years ago. Finebaum is a knob shining shill.