@Murray Hewitt: After posting twice, I realized, how the hell am I going to get approved? I think there's one psycho who does post over there and she/he/it isn't a starry.

@Len Bias Cocaine Surplus: I have ATT so I don't get MLB network, instead I get the NFL network. To be honest, I think I'd rather switch. The analysis of games is terrible, the broadcasts suck. The only good thing is watching some of the NFL films stuff.

@Murray Hewitt: I'm on the case.

@tastes_like_burning: And I would have gotten away ... if it weren't for you asshole Deadspin commenters.

@tastes_like_burning: Worse yet try listening to two women have a discussion about ghosts in their house. I shit thee not.

@Clint Biffman:

The Most Overrated Short Attention Span Book About Cryptography You've Been Forced to Hear About Over and Over: The Da Vinci Code.

@The_Night_Man_Cometh: He's giving 110 percent.

"I didn't know what AP meant actually. In the AP in Associated Press, I didn't know what that meant."

Thanks for that Kunis on the Portman, Aronofsky.

@OnTheTwelfthNightOfLloydChrist...: Even worse was hearing it through the gentle sound of Gordon Lightfoot's voice.

"This was not just drunken hooliganism: this was a man on a mission"

@7MinuteAbs: That's what I told DCFS when they asked about my kids black eyes.

@Eddie Murray Sparkles: I just lost my shit on that one.

Other than these features, think about what you'd want to do on Facebook today that you can't already do on your Android/Pre phone

When it comes to the great smuggle, rectal is always the best policy.

"As such, it became a common thing for me to tell some off-color jokes to the guys in the truck"

Oh and another thing! The shirts you sent us were the wrong size and gave us all rashes. What did I tell you about Hanes Beefy-T's?!

@dont-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac: Rich in history with a sour aftertaste.

I don't get it. Perhaps if the explanation had a Home Depot related theme, I might understand.