If the guy hadn’t been such an obnoxious tool about it, I maybe —maaybeee — would have scrounged up some ketchup and horseradish from the kitchen and made an attempt at conjuring up an off-menu cocktail sauce, because a) it’s literally two ingredients and a spoon and b) amaze and amuse the customers with your magic…

PLEASE go back in time and tell my old managers at Barnes & Noble this because it took a while for my knee to not hurt anymore after working there and I’m young and sprightly, I can’t even imagine how the 50+ year olds we had working there fared.

Ugh, so weird, right? I worked at Barnes & Noble and we weren’t supposed to sit on the floor ever, even if we were shelving the very bottom shelf, only bend (impossible unless you’re a gymnast) or kneel. There was no padding under the carpet, just raw cement, and one of my knees got really fucked up after I’d been…

is it

I worked weekend brunch at a chain restaurant by the mall as a teenager and it was.... i already live in God’s waiting room but then add brunch and the mall and church letting out. I can’t tell you how many times I served tables glasses of water with extra lemon...no....more lemon! Lots of lemon! Just to watch them…

Have you tried the Mexican version of a shrimp cocktail? Coctel de camaron is where it’s at:

dr b you are killing it in the comments on this post. +10 internets.

“your lazy fucking employee is over there stroking out I demand you do something to rectify this offense - such as a free book”

Walgreens seems to have the person at the checkout yelling “Welcome to Walgreens” as you walk in the door (at least the few by me).

That reminds me of another piece of my 3 months - it was right when The Titanic was coming out. And we were ORDERED to sell that movie...and if you remember back in the VHS days, obviously Blockbuster got movies before you could buy them at a store. But you could also BUY them...and in this “zero day” period, they…

As Batman, I should hope so.

Yeah. when I say “I want shrimp cocktail” I am talking about eating shrimp till I am full. Preferably in my own home. Where no one can judge me. And I don’t care if the ocean calls and says they are running out of shrimp.

In its simplest form, cocktail sauce is a mixture of ketchup (tomato sauce if you’re in Australia) and grated horseradish. A shrimp cocktail is a portion of chilled cooked shrimp served with cocktail sauce for dipping. Usually, it’s served as an appetizer/starter.

I’ve actually got a nice old people story to add this week!

“What kind of place serves terrible pizza and breakfast, and has an elderly clientele?”

Hell. Your server worked in Hell.

Ugh, I once got fired because my manager would only schedule me for 1 evening a week (Wednesdays, which are always pretty dead at a pet shop) and then complained that I wasn't learning as quickly as the guys working 5-6 days a week.

Just so you know, I work at a library and sitting to work on the bottom shelves is the approved “best practice” for the shelver’s ergonomic health. Any complaint from a crazy old lady about a staff member sitting on the floor to shelve would just be met with a fixed smile and nodding followed by a polite explanation…

My favorite regular from my serving days was Mr. Bartle. Never a fuss, tipped well, knew our names and always asked how my college studies were going. When he took a once-in-a-lifetime trip to the Galapagos Islands (in his mid-70s), on his return he came in one afternoon when he knew it would be slow to show us his…

You mean like this gem?

Noone expects the Spanish monogrammed thermos! Their weapon is surprise!