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At least he didn’t order the poo-tine.

Or Dead Snow!

Of course you would- the other two are already dead!

He really had a choice to double up the runners on 1st or 2nd.

This burn is enough to melt steel beams

Is your friend Tiger Woods?

Freedom of choice is what you want

And his fully-grown ones.

Unbelievable.

“I’m Shawn Spencer and this is my associate, Terrance Cox III.”

Thanks - I’m not a huge NASCAR fan, but it’s definitely an alternative I think should be mentioned. Plus, Tony Stewart was facing the end of his final-season championship hopes!

You may give me crap for this, but there is an elimination NASCAR race in Dover this afternoon. If you can include WNBA games and garbage futbol and MLS coverage surely you can make some space for this.

At beer festivals, I’d do it by old men. People would catch a whiff, complain, then look at the fogey and shrug their shoulders. Perfect cover!

I love his little juke just before he pulls the puck around for the backhand. Lundqvist deserves a “With Sympathy” card.

I thought this exact same thing.

Isn’t Charity one of his other daughters?

A hockey player would've at least finished their shift.

I always bring up something like this whenever I hear somebody saying that non-believers should just sit quietly.

Don’t be - that’s a huge pet peeve of mine

Peyton was probably upstairs getting pegged by Papa John.