The Daughters of the Confederacy here in town realized that their membership was dying and fading away so they invited the community to an “open house” to appear friendlier and I guess to recruit(??). I had to go because of my job. There was a big open room with tall elaborate chairs all around that looked right of…

This is a good one. Here’s one of my favorites:

That looks like the worst card in the “Chance” deck in Monopoly.

This list of places to never visit is incredibly helpful, A++++++++ work.

If you didn’t dick around in Zelda, you didn’t really play it, period.

We were both playing our respective copies of Zelda, because 2017 might be a harrowingly dystopian shit boulder chasing us down a mountain at a thousand miles per hour, but at least the Nintendo Switch is cool.

You’ve got that white.

Don’t feel too bad, Nathan; BotW is practically purpose-built for dicking around. The minimalist narrative setup doesn’t really compel plot-advancing actions the same way a more tightly-controlled tale does.

...that, and those Hynoxes aren’t going to off themselves.

Slightly behind Bill Chapel’s woodworking accident.

He wouldn’t have wrecked if he’d had a better dirt bike, equipped with technology and stuff.

Way behind Jeff Kent “washing his truck and slipping” (he was doing motorcycle stunts and crashed).

Let’s not forget that Indiana was about to throw the bum out of office and he took a VP slot on what looked like a huge longshot of a ticket largely to avoid the career-destroying outcome of losing reelection in a very red state thanks to the damage his stupid culture war crap brought to the state.

Failing upwards - a…

Of course, he killed fiddy men.

Except Cotton would break that little bitch in about five seconds.

Every time I think I have the timing down and get a little confident I proceed to get murdered very quickly.

problem is if you mess up the timing you ether get a face full of laser or a instantly broken shield

I wish I could parry two feet away, let alone half a mile.

“NASA today reported that Cassini’s final message read ‘I REGRET NOTHING’.”

The Yiga hideout took me two tries because the first time I decided it would be easier to just fuck those dudes up than try to sneak past them.