“Married to one another” sounds extremely weird to my ear ... like there are two separate marriages going on, with one person married to the second person, and then another marriage with the second person married to the first.

Don’t we have a doctor shortage in this country? Man, in addition to our immigration policies being just relentlessly cruel and unnecessary on a human level, it seems like Americans should be more concerned about keeping immigrants in this country just purely for our own self-interest, if nothing else.

Yep, I think I have weird proportions.

Yeah, I’ve given up completely on sizing in general. I don’t buy clothes online at all; I insist on trying on everything before I buy it.

Yeah, I’d never buy shoes there. And I try not to buy fast fashion in general anymore, but I still occasionally go to them for some things. Their skinny jeans seem to be the only ones that fit me, weirdly. And all their stuff is so cheap that it sort of evens out between the stuff that disintegrates immediately and…

Hahahahah, that’s amazing.

HAhahah, yes!

I have a winter coat that I got at H&M over ten years ago for like $60 that’s still my favorite coat ever. It’s warm and flattering and it’s held up remarkably well. On the other hand, I’ve gotten sweaters there that pilled and looked like garbage literally within hours of wearing them for the first time, so.

Yeah, I remember just riding the school bus back to someone else’s house after school, and then calling my mom and being like “BTW, spending the night at Heather’s tonight, see you tomorrow maybe.” This was in elementary school. School didn’t care, parents didn’t care, it was a blast.

Ohhhh, that’s annoying, yeah.

I bet you have a beautiful dining room.

Rich people don’t appreciate nice things!

It’s like the perfect middle ground between off-white and full-on taupe. Annoyingly nice and appropriate.

SAME. But probably no pot-filler for me. Seems unnecessary, and carrying big pots of water is a good arm workout. Everything else, though, yeah.

I really thought there would be a last-minute save from Brexit, too. But then again, I also thought that there was no way Trump was actually going to make it to inauguration on January 20th.

Right? Gross, no thank you.

Sure, but then I’d call that money towards college, rather than high school graduation money ...

No.

I don’t understand what the point of a bridal shower is. People will already most likely be giving you gifts for your actual wedding. Why have a whole other event for the express purpose of having people give you gifts?

That does not sound like a friendship worth preserving.