They built the framework and the Constitution in the 1770's to govern what could foreseeably take place in the distant future, i.e. the far-off 1870's, and maybe *gasp* even into 1900 and beyond if the world didn’t end before then. I don’t think it is reasonable to be angry with them because we elect people who are…

In hindsight I’m glad this looks as stupid as it did when it was written.

Since this is my first butt action since college, I have a question. Does “sub-butt” mean “worse than butt” or “not quite butt” in Burneko?

Interesting option. The perfect embodiment of Goodell’s own woeful indecisiveness, wrapped in a convenient package for you schmoes whose leagues stopped buying your bi-weekly line that you “made that substitution a long time ago, dude. Something must be wrong with the website.”

Take it back!

This concludes Diana’s seminar, How to Systematically Dismantle a Moronic Comment and Banish the Commenter: The Grays Await

Um, something with the Deadspin / Newshole server apparently did not compute for the last couple of sentences of my post. Either that, or I did a horrible job at proofreading. It was only 10:45 am, so I hadn’t even had a drink yet. Let me take another crack at the last few...

Sorry. You’re right. Probably should have let that one go untold altogether.

So not long after I moved to Houston (which may be more automobile-dominated than Detroit), I was in my old, new-at-the-time 4Runner approaching a green light to turn, when the driver in the car in front of me forgot what that long, skinny pedal does and idled her way through the intersection, causing me to be caught…

CM Punk to me will always be that guy who got destroyed in a real fight after refusing to shake hands like a bitch.

I understand the outrage with everything that Trump is and stands for, but I think that following this path would be an irreversibly bad decision. It would be a breach of trust that I do not think can be justified, because when it is placed in historical context, such a decision will ultimately be viewed as motivated…

Let’s talk a little more about this “pink” that you allegedly see.

I think I’m qualified to answer this one. If I drink a bunch of scotch at one time, or take your (or my) drug of choice orally, I do not feel the effect on my coherence all at once. Instead, I will gradually become more intoxicated as my body absorbs the ingested substance and works its way to peak concentrations of…

As far as quarterback play goes, the Dolphins should probably move on from Tannehill at the end of the 2016 season. Not necessarily because he’s not good enough (I believe he could still experience success if placed in a more favorable position)

Starman was tite. Giant Panther was also good.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

P.S. This duet...

What, exactly, do you think you see here? That video of nothing relevant might pass for evidence in Brazil, but not here (on Deadspin). Plus, if you don’t check your tone with Myrna, I’ll hurl unfulfillable physical threats at you and make really funny jokes at your expense.

Because her recipe is for kicking ass, and the alternative is a recipe for looking like you are making an emotional argument based on preconceived bias, and leaving yourself open to fact manipulation from someone who is better at being a radical.

Fair enough. I’ll admit my first reaction was negative on you reporting him for what seems like a minor transgression, but that was my mistake due to my assumptions. Not that you needed validation from a user with “Douchebag” in his very name, but I now think you did the right thing given the circumstances.