The thing is you shouldn't have to justify yourself anyway unless the only kid you were excluding was that brat. It's reasonable to have adult-only events. It's unreasonable as a guest to think people should throw the party you would prefer. I mean, I think it's perfectly OK to ask the bride and group for help in…

A lot of people don't seem to recognize that there are a fair number of demanding guests with conflicting needs bugging the shit out of the couple. At some point a bride has to put her foot down and say, "Hey, we're not giving into this demand that may cause a lot of issues for other guests. You are not the only…

Oh yeah. It's an important lesson to learn in life that no one cares about you as much as you. It's a good way to get over narcissistic tendencies.

Well that's just bad etiquette! I can't (I mean I can) believe people use "Family" and then text you- sorry no kids! That's terrible.

Suckers (or equally awful people) are born every minute.

Right? And don't some of these parents want a little adult time where they can drink and talk to adults and not be constantly supervising a young child?!

I think your situation is a bit different though- you were trying to find fair and reasonable ways to limit your numbers. The bride in the article sounds like she's been keeping a tab on all her friends missteps just so she can get back at them later.

True. I'm just saying if her "friends" fall into her categories, they likely don't want to attend her wedding anyway.

Oh of course there are unreasonable brides. I'm just saying that often the brides get blamed for every issue a guest has even if the bride had nothing to do with it. I've seen people continue to blame the bride even when the groom stepped up and acknowledged that the problem was caused by HIS decision.

I don't. I find most brides to be quite reasonable. Brides actually get unfairly dumped on a lot in the wedding planning process. The bride in this article, however, sounds like a peach.

I know! I love friends who keep a running tab of everything and expect tit for tat!

This bride is delusional if she thinks any of these friends give a shit in the first place.

I have found that in the RARE circumstance that someone with BPD admits to wrong-doing it's only because s/he thinks s/he can manipulate you by doing so. And as soon as you hold them to account they will suddenly deny whatever it was they admitted to. The gaslighting in many ways is very difficult to deal with because…

Got it.

I think professional body builders use them before competitions so you can probably find them through a body building site.

Sorry, what? I don't understand.

Myself and others have talked about our parents having BPD, a child cannot just leave her parent. I had to live with the abuse my entire childhood. Extricating myself as an adult lead to MORE abuse. I no longer talk to my parent, I did leave. He still tries to mess with my life. It doesn't matter that he processes…

That is some epic victim blaming. Having a personality disorder does not make someone less responsible for their actions. It may allow for people to better understand the behavior but the individual is still totally responsible for victimizing others. Myself and others in this thread also have personal experience but…

My only interpretation of Mark's comment is that it's pretty common for people with BPD to end up in relationships with Narcissists. Also, they have an unstable sense of self so when they first begin a relationship they go through an idealization phase and "mirror" or rather become whatever their partner wants them to…

My experience has been pretty similar. It's galling to see people on here claiming that it is rare for people with BPD to commit abuse. Psychologists would totally disagree. Also, the minimizing of manipulation is ridiculous. Healthy people don't think manipulating their loved ones is normal and acceptable.