Emmitt Smith: So that’s why they call it an “oldbitchuary.”

I fully expect the owners to pass a rule requiring players to attend the White House. However, I also fully expect them to pass it when the issue is at its absolute nadir and likely dying on the vine.

LOCK HIM UP!

Fox News is a disgrace to journalism. Who has to make up a lie to complain about Philadelphia?

Carol Sharrow was charged with manslaughter in the death of 68-year-old Douglas Parkhurst

Or just date someone named “Stacy Smith” who loves windmills. Problem solved!

I’m amazed how many people are misinterpreting your comment.

In the the old Batman versus Superman debate, and it always comes down to Batman needing to have everything work absolutely perfectly. All of his traps, all of his plans, all of his equipment has to operate perfectly with no mistakes to even have a shot at beating Superman. All it takes is one slip-up and Superman can…

It’s tacky to blame the refs and Lebron’s teammates but both the refs and Lebron’s teammates were real bad so that’s what I’m gonna do.

To be fair, I think it took everyone a couple seconds to process how massively JR was fucking up

LeBron could have cut him before OT, either figuratively or literally, and nobody would say a word. What an all-time fuckup.

I asked my dad for an allowance since I was mowing the yard and doing all the laundry and dishes. He said he couldn’t afford it and I should be happy with free room and board, but then he spent like $6000 on a new pool table and then another $8000 on a jacuzzi. (Plus another $25 on a hooker.)

AI’s head just exploded.

Counterpoint - You’re a fucking idiot.

Nah, it’s more like you go to your favorite restaurant and order your favorite dish, then become enraged when the waitstaff doesn’t engage in a gratuitous display of jingoism before bringing out the breadsticks. (What does your food order have to do with jingoism?) Then they still give you your favorite dish, even…

i too will not play qb for the Browns

Recap of every Hackenberg training camp pass attempt:

Why wasn’t Deadspin (and specifically, you Diana) able to find Ms. Ennis’ incident from 2011? Don’t you do simple searches of the people you write about before publishing?

this is one of the best deadspin comments I’ve seen, and I’ve been here since ‘10. great hustle.