The wages of going three wide into the tri-oval is death.

Dipshitswich Town

That gator would love to make a hole in one................of those deer.

This is the best Deadspin post ever, and I say that as a long-time Deadspin fanboy.

Coincidentally, Jeremy Lin’s nickname in China is Gary

These nicknames are Han point.

I have a hard time believing the Patriots would employ anyone capable of committing such a heinous crime for so many years.

“I’ve not gotten laid more than any journalist on earth.”

The Sex Cauldrun? I thought they shut that place down

1996? This looks like a homemade science-fair attempt to create a working camera and film out of only potatoes.

Glad to see our police have military equipment from 2016 and photo equipment from 1996.

The Man-Durian Candidate

I believe you’re thinking of the Coen brothers who make films, as opposed to the Cohen brothers who presumably raise female chickens in groups.

Obama, Where Art Thou?

Five cheerleaders told Macur that the team had them serve as escorts...

Fuckin Thanos.

To be fair, if you hire a guy named “Strom” and he doesn’t turn out to be a segregationist, you’d feel cheated too.

your mom

If this were our house, the next day there would be a flat rock in front of the curb to use as a step, courtesy of Mrs Lizardo.