I’ve been on Jalopnik for its complete 15 year existence and this is in the running for the dumbest post I’ve ever seen on here.

The whole thing made more sense to me when I saw that it was an Altima. Are we sure the car didn’t pull itself into the pump to end its own misery?

camo is a cultural identifier. 

Is this safety system because of one of those onerous job/economy killing government regulations that libertarians and conservatives say will destroy everything and kill us all like clean air and water regulations?

Nightmare two-car garage you say?

Looking at the responses, I suppose I did. But I genuinely didn’t think it’d be necessary.

Look, if the cop told the kid to ‘Freeze’, and he was holding ‘anti-freeze’, how is that not blatant failure to comply? Easy grounds for opening fire.

In Russia, the rubber impregnates you.

Those people don’t respond positively to much beyond Bud Light and meth. 

Ah, yes, the Fuzzy Zoeller special.

Why are you guys reprinting an article from 1992? I mean, some institution doing the “Hey, it’s Black Day, let’s serve them some black food...” thing? Seriously, there’s enough news today for you to cov...

Obviously...

Alternative plan, blow it up? 

I have fond memories of the last time gas prices were up above $4 in my area, and that’s not even adjusting for inflation between then and now (would be roughly $5 today). There was suddenly lots of “local interest” news reporting, where they’d catch a Karen carefully meting out a meager $20 worth of gas into her…

And the nation would split into two factions, one who say the deadly door is deadly and the other that say the door is a conspiracy and doesn’t actually exist.

Those new laws:

It seems that we still don’t know enough about these two incidents to draw any firm conclusions. [In particular, the Florida one just seems kind of bizarre.]

I lived in Bakersfield, CA for 1 year when I was a kid. I don’t remember much about that town (there’s not much to remember) but the one thing we would do for “fun” was to wet the grass next to the sidewalk then take off our shoes and see who could walk the furthest barefoot down the scorching cement before jumping…

I can’t hear any story about Phoenix, Arizona being horrifically hot without thinking about King of the Hill

It is depressing, but I know people who’s lives would be ruined with a $3000 repair bill for the vehicle they use to survive. I get why someone might react this way because their basic life needs are being put in danger. I’m not condoning it, but I can understand why the truck owner was so upset.