Oh wow, I hope that IRS is all over that, because that rules afoul of the independent contractor laws. You can’t tell someone to work in the office or regulate the hours they work and still consider them a 1099...

Oh, thank you! So the huge tear that went from my vagina to my asshole didn’t REALLY take a ton of stitches and weeks and weeks of 3x/day Sitz baths to heal! Nor was all that lochia really pouring out of my vagina for 2 months! And my uterus took zero time to shrink back down from medicine-ball size to pear size.…

Canada’s maternity/paternity leave works off of our unemployment benefits. Works great actually.

I never thought that Cosmo would be more willing to ask substantive questions than the New York Times, and yet here we are.

I felt sympathy for Ivanka when she seemed to stick to “He’s my dad, he’s great” statements. Now she has waded into spouting brazen lies, and claiming media bias when presented with facts.

Oh please be safe from internet assholes, tiny child....

Thank you Jay’s assistant, that’s very good to hear.

This isn’t a farcical presidential race, Gabrielle. The media doesn’t have to pretend that both sides of the argument are legitimate/equal.

I hope for the sake of the nation that one day, the Green Party will discover that sarcasm does, indeed, exist.

Normally I’d be against the relentless abuse of a dumb animal, but I’m ok in Ann Coulter’s case.

A classic-

Amy Schumer is experiencing some less than stellar book sales.

He chose Cornell and we’re calling him a genius?

Oxy gets them hooked, then they find out that Heroin is easier to get and cheaper.

Some people seem to think it’s an interactive pissing contest instead of a performance by a professional. These people invariably and mistakenly think they are the funny one in the room, usually because they are really drunk, or really stupid.

“I was going to leave anyway,” says the guy in the very expensive seats who felt the need to ruin the show for everyone else.

HOW TO DEAL WITH A MAN APPROACHING YOU WHEN YOU’RE WEARING HEADPHONES:

KYLIE JFC

Don’t Tyga and Kylie and the rest of their ilk just lease their rides? How do they have so much dough? for doing what?

SS is generally not subject to garnishment because it’s considered “essential income” - like, you need that money to live. There are other methods, however - none of which are especially good. I am not an expert on Colorado law, so I hesitate to say anything. However, almost all people have something that could be…