(checks playoff stats) Nope, no passes yet.

How do people who don’t wear their seat belts manage to deal with their car screaming at them to put their seat belts on?

For those who were wondering, a “Jersey Wall” is when a bunch of spray tanned Italian women in the club surround their friend to protect her from an Ed Hardy-wearing bro trying to roofie her Bud Light Lime-a-Rita.

It’s almost as if people die all the time every year...

And people laughed at me for not dropping him from my fantasy team.

“As soon as he returns one of my calls, I’ll let him know immediately”

I suppose the conventional wisdom could be modified to be “you either need a great QB, a good QB and a top 3 defense, or a mediocre QB and a historically great defense”.

Sleeper pick for the worst pick of this bunch? Justin Gilbert. Yes, he was bad in the way all Browns picks are bad—he was lousy at football and out of the league before his rookie contract expired—but just look at the next NINE picks in that first round: Anthony Barr, Eric Ebron, Taylor Lewan, Odell Beckham, Aaron…

My God they have ruined so many young men’s lives.

One can make a plausible argument that 2008's “no pick” is one of the top 5 on this list.

dying.... or not.

I anticipate that they will accidentally draft Mrs. Garrett.

The most surprising thing about this list is that six of them were good picks. I would never have guessed the number was that high.

It’s not too early to start putting out feelers on a possible bid.

Well yeah, cause the fatass bartender wouldn’t serve him.

How many minutes do you think it’ll take him to get kicked out of the next bar? I figure four.

“one of Fort Wayne’s best.”

When you start every thought with “When you....”

Someone needs to sync this first inning with Jim Ross

Gotta keep that 3-1 meme alive.