4 Years of Dennis Miller.

It’s because they’re made in China.

It was alternately scary/amusing to me this morning how tweets by both Trump and Wikileaks hit the same notes:

Mainstream press has, almost without exception, mishandled everything about Donald Trump every step along the way. I pretty much don’t expect anything different now.
I look forward to eventually dying in a nuclear fire because he mistyped some tweet meant to be about McDonald’s lack of quality Happy Meal toys anymore.

TL; DR, but I know what happened the last time someone had secret meetings with that guy, and it didn’t turn out great for anyone

Robert Kraft approves.

Chris Berman: [flashes wallet]

that is a costanza

Overloaded leather is also his online dating profile name.

Not to worry, the Raven fans will continue to be antagonizing DBs.

Short and sweet is the way to go with retirement statements. For instance, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had the occasion to use “You can’t fire me — I quit!”

Not likely, considering the plan is for each new carrier to span 40 acres

*HPOCIC

As of January 20th, the word “crew” will be removed from the Navy’s official terminology, to be replaced by “posse”.

“Trump wants to expand fleet of thug boats.”

First order of business: the commanders of all aircraft carrier battle groups will now have the title of HNIC.

Yahoo: “We were hacked!”

Checks to see Trump’s cabinet appointments and rhetoric over the last two years....yep, that statement checks out.

Hopefully he can cut costs by 60%, or 3/5.

This is the payoff on the long con of typewriter inventor Jerry Qwerty.