It's an oldie but a goldie.

My old P-38 can opener is the best tool I've ever owned.

30 Rock.

Dunno. Not a lawyer. But I would imagine it's in the public record, and post-conviction, it's allowed to be published publicly.

It was on the TeeVee?

This is not unheard of, not by a long shot.

Peanuts. Unless you could find a bunch of actors with disproportionately large heads.

"that's a long hike to the mess for lunch. must really be something."

Thanks. I understood he was just checking on her. I didn't take it personally. But it was still kind of a mood killer. :) Upon further reflection (this happened almost 30 years ago) I think it was when she and I were leaving the diner when they toasted us with their mugs. I know it happened, but it was so long ago now…

Many years ago I was a virile 17-year-old with an equally enthusiatic 16-year-old girlfriend.

Just your standard white male right-wing gun nut. Nothing to see here.

Always is.

Did your mom name you after both of her partners?

nvm... redundant

"I wonder how I can ensure everyone in the world sees this unflattering picture of me..."

Someone's either turned on or off on this man's oral technique.

I wonder if FOX News will be sending reporter (and rumored piss drinker?) Todd Starnes to cover this.

Or Russia. Because that's where it happened.