I’d like to cancel my card order that is on its way and redo ours like this. Next year!

SAME

I have so many things I want to say right now, but because this poor child can’t help the world she was born into, I’m just going to scream them into a pillow.

This is why Karen Walker from Will&Grace is one of my sheroes as well. Horrible women unite!!

Oh god, and his numb tongue. So funny!!!!

It is 27 degrees here right now and I just turned down my heater. GOOD GOD.

Wait, WHAT. He danced to Closer??? I can't believe I never knew this. Kids, you are going to bed early tonight, mama has a movie to watch ...

That’s ... not how that works.

You too? Does he have the Obama “O” symbol with the red line through it, too? I know that guy.

Hi Tennessee neighbor! So glad to see you also share in my pride over this walking piece of shit that helps lead our state straight to the 1600s!! Seriously, fuck that guy.

This is genuinely upsetting to me as well. Millihelen as become such a guilty (not even guilty!) pleasure of mine!

ALL OF THIS

Where do you get the NYX Milk? Ulta?

I’d like to nominate her for Empress of the Universe.

Yea, if you can’t see the bow from space, it’s not good enough. ESPECIALLY in Texas.

I haven’t watched the video or seen any clips of it, but I guarantee I could give an accurate description of this guy, down to his graphic tshirt.

Good to know!!

I recently bought a set of brushes from hautelook.com that are the Morhpe brand. I got a set of 10 for $18 (well, I ordered it, it hasn’t come yet). Maybe keep an eye on that site? That seemed like a great deal, but I don’t know anything about that brand.

This is amazing. Well done.

You guys, I am starting to think Ben Carson has been having a stroke for like, what? 6 months? And no one is helping him. Should we call 911 or something?