I once helped someone (I’m in the industry) who had 20 bridesmaids... In a part of the country where this is not commonplace nor where she was royalty. I don’t have words.

...and some people bitch when weddings are on a Saturday because it ruins the middle of the weekend. Personally I don't care because I work in healthcare and there's no such thing as a weekend, but you can't please everybody.

And our best man

My bridesmaid (seriously - that’s one of the photos from the wedding). We didn’t ask her to be one, but she just stood next to us the entire time we said our vows and just happily wagged her tale.

Yeah, someone in my family had 11 bridemaids, 11 groomsmen, plus a bunch of ushers and “honorary” bridesmaids, so all of the pictures of the wedding party were taken from a great distance using a wide-angle lens, meaning that you can barely make out people’s faces.

husband had a bm

The number definitely should be related to the size of the wedding. My little sister had 8 bridesmaids and 8 groomsmen (I was not one of them as I don’t live on the same continent, but I did use her wedding as an excuse to buy a new dress in her colours). She had MAYBE 60 people at the wedding. Sixteen attendants…

All y’all have way too many friends.

Yes yes yes! Exactly! Picking my bridal party was for me, at least, a very personal thing - these are some of the most important relationships in my life. WHY does anyone else need to tell you how many of those you are supposed to have???

The worst I’ve seen was something like a dozen bridesmaids and a dozen groomsmen. My friend was in the wedding, and when the wedding pictures were posted to Facebook, it looked like almost all the wedding guests were in the wedding party. Keep it scaled to your guest list, people. 100 or under? Get a close friend or…

Honest question, how far along in the planning are you/how logistically involved of a wedding are you going to have? Because absolutely no judgment on your aesthetics, etc. (you do you!) but as someone who is about 1.5 months out, just thinking about having to deal with/cat-herd 12 groomsmen gives me hives. But you…

Oh lord - my saying “Wear whatever you want” to my bridesmaids turned into EVEN MORE work. Because each of them contacted me individually and asked to set up a time to go looking for their dress with me one-on-one. They said it was because they wanted to make sure I liked the dress that I picked, but, seriously, as…

NO SUCH THING!

who had lentils as their attendants

I LOL’d at “matching the table runners”. Like, not even the flowers? You want to match awkward table linens? That’s just too funny.

I was like, “Has anyone made the obligatory lentil joke on this post yet?? No? OK, I SHALL!”

I laughed out loud at your lentil joke, it is my favorite thing I have read all day. (And I say that as a very long time Jezzie commenter. I have to go revise my original comment to include all my lentil attendants I now must absolutely have)

Your post made me smile because we’re having a big wedding party (just worked out that way), and everyone is picking out their own clothes — so no matching. With as many attendants as we’re having, matching would look positively cult-like.

People like to nit-pick about stupid shit when it comes to weddings, and Jez is no different. Do not ask for approval, because you won’t get it from those who had lentils as their attendants.

Sincere question: why can’t they just attend your wedding and show their love and support in their own way without all the formality. Personally, I’d much rather spend my time and energy putting together a nicer gift!