People have been shooting up schools in America since the 1800s. If you count school massacres without guns, it goes back to before the nation even existed. Trust me, the problem isn’t firearms.

According to so many articles and commentators, they did.

Only one new nightmare? I think she’s being too optimistic.

This is... factually incorrect on two fronts.

There actually is a cancer that they think is caused by orgasm deficiencies. Naturally, it affects male sex organs only.

If the soldiers with their hands on the launch keys believe the order is unlawful, you can bet your ass that they’ll ignore him. And thanks to how antiquated the launch computers are, it could take them months or even years just to train new personnel to be able to launch nukes. And given the nature of nukes, the only…

Read human history. As a species, we’re sexist, racist, cynical assholes who will murder each other in large numbers for the flimsliest of excuses. Women and men both have a long history of backstabbing their own causes in record numbers, to the point that it’s amazing feminism got as far as it did.

Neither does Trump.

He’s a delegator. Even when he was in charge of his companies, he didn’t do a damn thing himself until it was absolutely necessary. That’s why he can boast about bringing them out of bankruptcy multiple times; it’s the only time he actually bothered to manage them.

Name any century that isn’t marred by stupid violent shit. Even the 21st is. Iraq, for example.

Just remember: Americans getting out and actually voting for once is what put him in office.

“Hope is dangerous.”

No, it wasn’t. It was so boring that news agencies stopped broadcasting it within two missions, only to end up with something exciting when part of the rocket was damaged by an explosion.

This, pretty much. They chose the most scandal-ridden choice they could. It became a competition of honesty about those scandals. Now people are surprised Clinton lost against someone who is even more scandal-ridden, but utterly shameless about it.

America has never done anything the cool way. Why did you expect this to be any different?

I hate to break it to you, but look at the election results. The world you knew didn’t exist. It was just an illusion.

Well, it would require taking lessons from a few porn stars...

What I pity is the person who will have to do it in the next election. Because we both know Trump will manage to serve two terms.

I calculate a chance of 1 in 57.3. That’s elections, not candidates. So it’s a lot lower than it looks.

As these election results show, there’s a lot of Americans who don’t think those values and institutions deserve respect.