“Time to sell some pro-PAIN.”

Trump: “Ore... Ida?”
Aide: No, sir. It’s “Ne-VA-da”.

Any recommendations on a diaper bag that still makes me look like I can perform a root canal on a grizzly bear while still carrying my newborn?

I’m not saying I’d vote for the guy but let be realistic: Warren Buffet was paying the same amount of taxes as his secretary.

Recently I’ve been binging Luther and there was an episode where a creepy AF dude comes out from under some woman’s bed and obviously I caught it at around midnight so CLEARLY I HAVENT SLEPT SINCE I SAW THAT. Really, I live with 2 dogs who would equally lose their minds if someone showed up out of no where BUT. My…

I was thinking the same thing. I’m not that creative, so I wondered how they’d even go beyond one season, haha. But the first episode was great!

Knowing ZERO about it maybe the lines of reality will start to blur and you won’t know what’s real and what isn’t.

In elementary school, my hamster died and I was crying about it. (1st grade yo). I went to the principals office for what I think was just going to be a quick pep talk. He mentioned that I really reminded him of his daughter. I spent the whole day with him, going around doing principal things- it was a blast. It…

i always voted that the car kills it’s occupants over the crosswalk people. that’s what they get for riding in an autonomous car.

Your family sounds adorable!

“I did not know that story!” (said in the tone of an adult congratulating a child on their first day of Kindegarten.) Amazing!

Yeah but why keep bringing up the emails. She can only address it like 1,000 times and to her credit, she said in this debate - “Yep, I was wrong...I would’ve handled it differently, etc.”. So what - wait 5 minutes and ask about it again? Not sure what that does - she’s just going to give the same answer.

Even more damning to me is how easily Donald took bait from Hillary. It’s a debate, the other candidate is going to try and trip you up. Not preparing for the subject matter is hubris, not being prepared for basic debate tactics is incompetence.

This is maybe evidence that having 17 guys on a stage shouting zingers is not a good model for selecting a candidate who will need to debate one on one in October.

It’s literally in the CDC recommended vaccine schedule for children. That may be a newer thing, but it is in there. It’s listed right after the Hep-B vaccine.

An Arnold Palmer does not contain alcohol

Cool story.

If only there were some sort of global, ubiquitous network of data that included hundreds of thousands of hours of free porn, so poor guys like that wouldn’t have to shell out that kind of cash.

If only.

Welcome to Counter-Point, the practice that opened up across the street from Dr. Nerdlove, to offer a fake-medically important second opinion to your dating diagnosis:

OK, Dutch Treat (I’m just gonna pretend like you’re in Amsterdam):

I believe it’s Laura Richards who says “stalking is murder in slow motion.” We have to start treating stalking, dv, and sexual violence as huge red flags for murderers :(