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From the headline, I was hoping that Dr. Doom was the one doing the jive-talking, and Luke was proud of him for that.

Remember when conservatives did this after Barack Obama was elected in ‘08? Oh, wait, you don’t, because IT DIDN’T HAPPEN.

Or if he spends five minutes trying to climb a building only to repeatedly run into the wall over and over again.

I mean, heavens forbid they actually use that technology to figure out where a punt goes out of bounds so the refs don’t walk it back up an extra 10 yards, it’s not like I’m bitter about that or anything.

Funny, my wife asked for much the same thing.

Salt Lake Beads?

“one could read the departures of Mike Tirico, Skip Bayless, Bill Simmons, Colin Cowherd, Robert Flores, and Jason Whitlock, among others, as evidence of a talent exodus”

or one could...uh...not do that, at least for the even-numbered ones in the group.

Does anyone know what happened to Limitless?

“Arena”?

Fuck your Facebook page.

Why is a blog directing me to it’s facebook page for content?

Another option is to just start calling the police all the fucking time with “sightings” of slightly mannish women or slightly effete men using public rest areas. Have that shit on speed dial- if enough people keep calling and dragging them hither and yon to respond, they may eventually cry uncle purely from a…

I’m drunk at an airport, though this was a Deadspin article. Thought there was a new commissioner in the NFL, got really confused. I hope I make my flight.