After Romney lost they told themselves it was because he wasn't conservative enough. I can't wait to see this year's excuse.

AB, these political eulogies are fan-fucking-tastic.

Dear Johnny, I meant to write you sooner but I’ve just been busy
You said your girlfriend’s living with you now, how far from home is she?
Look, I’m really flattered you came by the stadium like that,
And here’s an autograph for you, it’s on the front of the Dallas cap
I’m sorry I didn’t see you week 16, I musta missed you
…

I was deliberately making myself the butt of the joke as a stealth way of making a complete non sequitur joke.

I need more articles where we laugh at dumb people. I definitely need more articles where we laugh at dumb people who are so arrogant in their stupidity that they’re willing to write terribly composed emails.

Or the people who still don’t get it are just the stupidest people on earth. It was a good joke.

Yeah, OK, keep trying to cover up the fact that you don’t understand scores. The team that scores more points is the winner, except in golf, where more points is bad, unless you’re playing with the Modified Stableford Scoring System, in which case scoring more points is good again, unless you’re playing against a…

Jay and Dan are good people, as it Katie Nolan. They all deserve much better.

Reader Mike sent along this story, which has Hank Stram genuinely hurt by Lombardi’s comments.

IslandReign has the correct answer. The alternate answer is that nobody younger than me has ever played Bridge, so the meaning of the phrase has been lost. I’d like people today to remember history and why the third game in a split series is known as the rubber match. I’d like them to know learn the rules and the…

Canaan Gives Way To Ish; Real Promised Land In Sight

It’s going to be amusing when Philly finishes with the second worst record this season and loses out on the Ben Simmons lottery to the Lakers.

Referees used to have it much rougher before the NFL started televising games.

“This is why I play volleyball.” —Sydel Curry

I’m no expert, but that Steph Curry guy might be a pretty good NBA player.

I wouldn’t be so quick to blame Vontaze for such a monumental lapse in judgement.

I can’t wait for Michael B. Jordan to get a title shot because of this.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA