If your phone has developed enough consciousness to become distracted, then congratulations on achieving your voyage to the historic year of 2016. Tell us what the future holds, future-man!

That would have been a blind taste test.

I just love farting in general. I’ve gotten really good at being stealthy about it over the years.

Incidentally, restaurant desserts are also the best return on investment on Calorie Content ;-)

Just remember - you’re paid to work in a shit environment, not shit in a work environment.

When you’re at work, just think about how you’re literally getting paid to poop. You’ll relax and you’ll be excited to do it again. “I made $5 for dropping a deuce today!”

The top myth should be “Prepaid is bad.” People still think the prepaid carriers have local-only coverage, no long distance, use old/bad cellular networks, are only for people with bad credit, etc.

The truth is they are reselling the same voice and LTE data from the big 4 companies - and you can instantly cut your…

It sounds like this trick only applies when the doors have opened but nobody has entered or exited and so the lift is basically waiting for whoever requested that floor stop to enter/leave. If someone has already crossed the threshold since the doors opened, then yes, it would almost certainly just add to the delay.

My advice: Don’t say you “need” a raise. It’s none of your manager’s business what the additional money would be used for (ie. if you are living paycheck to paycheck, but an extra dollar an hour would allow you to pay your cable bill every month).

This is what I do—

That second paragraph may be the most unintentionally funny pieces of uninformed editorializing/guilt diffusion I’ve ever read on lifehacker.

Yes! I’ll just ride my bike from Missouri to Australia. Why didn’t I think of that?

“In some cases, keyboards can be even germier than a toilet seat” - yes but can I just point out that the germs on my keyboard didn’t come out of my arse.

Are you on a Windows PC? Hit Shift 5 times.

If you wanted in via the rescue shell you would.

Um, that’s not the point at all lol. You wouldn’t fix this to avoid “accidental hacking.” You would fix this to avoid people using a known exploit intentionally get access to your system.

credit card balance of $15,355, the average in the U.S.

Missing is the data about how much the average american saved when the Economy tanked and rates went to zero...

being totally out of touch with reality.

It’s not supposed to be grabbed by the passenger. It’s for the doorman.