"Lo! I haven't shit for a fortnight, Oberon!"

Good thing I skullfucked the SATs into oblivion, like everything else in high school.

Fuck ski jumping. Give me tire jumping.

Sherman says and does smart things; he is smart.

I mean... you do realize the irony of saying this on this article, right? Here we have a man who is vicariously in the position of getting all the free sex he wants from straight men, and the whole experience left him so shaken that he had to quit just after 2 hours and decided to write a huge ass post about it on…

Considering the possible ramifications of going to a movie in Colorado, the first person I'd invite is my shooting guard.

ANECDATA ARE NOT DATA. SOURCES OR GTFO.

snot right

"They don't watch Matthew McConaughey deliver a ten minute soliloquy about stroking his dick." That was actually a monologue, not a soliloquy. He was talking to Leo, not himself.

Seriously. Go take your kid to see a movie with bunnies.

Parent shaming. Good to see that some shaming is still allowed.

Not sure why, but I sort of giggled at this being letter being posted right after the "2 Broke Girls" article.

I have a child, I like to go to the movies, and I approve this message.

THIS GUY, I CALL HIM JOHNNY HOLMES BECAUSE HE CANT STOP SPRAYING ALL OVER THE FIELD.

Waiter: Perhaps a dessert?
Manning: Sure any recommendations?
Waiter: A Turnover?
Manning: :/

Vinny?