Sadly, in some parts of the country, they don’t have access to real Marshmallow Fluff, and have to do with that ersatz Kraft crud.

In any manor, they prefer filet mignon to hot dogs.

Meat skewer.  Plus, yellow jackets like food. 

They’re veen protected since the 1920s or so, because they were almost wiped out for the ladies’ hat industry.  But in Maine fishing communities, they have never been respected. But seagulls really do a big service, cleaning up rotten fish and stuff.  It isn’t their fault we are messy. 

I love this video. 

That’s clearly someone’s attractive cousin.

I live in Maine. We find it hilarious.

“Adventures with Bill” will always hold a special place in my heart.

My dad lamented its disappearance - I bought him some when it came back, but, alas, he cannot eat it without potentially destroying his crowns.

I liked the vanilla. I am not a banana fan.

Clark Bar is another Necco casualty.  :(

Perfect for shingles on your gingerbread house.

6 foot tortillas are downsizing??!?

This kind of crap is why there’s a “do not eat” warning on Tide Pods. 

Dear Salty Waitress:

They don’t have fruit on her home planet.

I have been to a bad Olive Garden. Not sure how they screwed upeggplant Park, but they did.

That’s bad.

And yet, children are humans and dogs are not.  I don’t care how much you love your dog, he is not your progeny, and cannot inherit your lands.

I assume that the emotional complex supported by an emotional support peacock can only be narcissism.

“I’m allergic to parsley.”