"In my younger and more vulnerable years, my penis gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since."

Dad?

And someday, it'll be herstory. Or "shartstory."

It's very humbling to read something so intimate and that takes such vulnerability to write, and it's also humbling when you want to write something back that can encapsulate all that loneliness that is so personal, but also so recognizable, and find that you lack the ability to do so. I hope you have better news…

Same! I still fondly remember the day I saw the title and picked it up.

*scribbles note*

I mean, he is, but not in a way that I necessarily admire, or envy.

Damnit, I should have scrolled down to see this.

Paula Shore starring in a Cronenberg picture.

Comey wanted a "real not job," but firing him took off a lot of pressure from Trump's erection.

Man, this administration really didn't do its homework when they put you in charge of Homeland Security.

Tuppence? I hardly even know him!

And certainly not ethnic enough for ¡Rob!

Ellen "Foghorn" Cleghorne?

True G knows snitches get stitches.

And she has alien DNA spliced into her clone body.

Speaking of White City, the wind seems to have been blowing the Futurists way, if you get my drift.

Which is liberals' fault because…

Did you save a lock of her hair? I think that's a thing parents do.

Geez, that sounds great. If I ask politely, will you fix my life, too?