The rest are just euphemisms for genitals.

My wife, Eleanor.

Something about how if you called her a pretty pretty princess and made her laugh, then she was yours.

I bent my Woke-ie!

"Bork bork bork!"
"You're disgusting"

Please! Mister Kinja is my father. Call me "Iamworriedabouttheswitchto"!

Wordplay like this will only escalate, kit for kat.

Topical!

Alligator pears, for that vintage retro cool.

And the source of his power!

Depends: who bathed most recently? Whose beard was longer and whispier? Whose apocryphal phrases adorn more etsy posters?

I do see a lot of pork in those pictures.

"Edward, where are my panties?"
*cross-eyed* "Panti-mobiru?"

Alt-Good.

Johnny Cash did it better?

I haven't thought about Dennis Kucinich in quite a while. Now that you've made me do so, I also remember that his wife is disproportionately more attractive than he is.

Is the seed still inside?

That salty fellow?

Like a clown. Like, it amuses you.

I do believe I will give room service a jangle and order us up some etouffee.