I'm fairly sure the stiltedness was intentional, but either way it's just not funny. I mostly loved the new episode but I wish they had waited and backfilled the exposition more. That intro is going to turn off a lot of uninitiated viewers.

THERE IS NO KNOWN ANTY-DOTE!

It's really a shame that while Space Mutiny is a perfect introduction to newbies, the host segments are almost all garbage thanks to SciFi's "story arc" mandate.

Needs more Peaches.

Wow, Mads Mikkelsen was really buff and tan back then.

It's like when twins play a toddler on TV, but here the character is 15 and no one on the show seems to notice. It's zany!

Cisco: "We could call it… Cisco's Angels." *half a dozen withering stares* "Or, y'know, some other name that doesn't suck. I'm flexible."

Imagine all the time and product he put into maintaining that 'do just to impress the truckers and loggers of rural Canada.

"Family jewels." Is that why they're hiding the show in the streaming equivalent of a worn-out set of tighty whities?

This is the correct usage.

I don't normally do this, but POINTS

"May I introduce my daughters, Dunder & Blitzen?"

So he gets to be the titular lead and the fatherly authority figure all at once. Does this mean we'll presumably be getting Thunder & Lightning sooner than later?

Nah, Robert Z'Dar.

I Ctrl-F'ed this page for the word jizz and my computer burst into flames.

If it doesn't require me to watch Riverdale, I'm sold.

It often sounds like there's little difference between small children and college roommates.

Look out, PewDiePie, here comes DoritoDustFiveO'ClockShadow

But tell Cracked you "discovered" this fan theory.

I wonder if the movie Flash will have Johns' pet dead mother retcon or if they'll avoid as many similarities to the TV show as possible…