Jeff Sessions will let him borrow his.
I hope he looks good in white.

Back in the 60's/70's at the Friar's Club. But since then, no.

A spit. When you roast someone/thing it's on a spit, not a spike.

*shoots rev_skarekroe with a bazooka*

Rob Hoegee? He's a real hero!

The first test of the female condom!
—Crow T. Robot, 814-Riding With Death

That's why I do it!

This is a kink, right? This kind of thing has to be this guy's kink.

Should we care about the film's aspect ratio?

Dawes?

I wait until there's 3 stories in at least 2 days to meme-ify. Like the Alex Jones thing.
It implies that the writers are breathlessly covering it, even if nothing is really happening. That's where the humor comes from.

I'm assuming this "night mayor" will have his own quirky NBC sitcom, with its own cool saxophone-y jazz theme song.

The night mayor needs to pay the troll toll if he wants to dance.

No dancing, not allowed.
—Tom Servo, 302-Gamera

No. Because it make financial sense to ditch Disqus. Terrible, terrible sense.

And for good reason.

I would make a booze-related joke at his expense, if I hadn't agreed to lay off on that.

As long as my beloved Publix is ok, I don't care.

Sorry, I stopped paying attention to this Simpsons rap about a third of the way through.
…
Haha, just kidding. My eyes glazed over when I saw Jimmy Fallon. I didn't watch any of it!

Jimmy Fallon's greatest nemesis: Rex Banner and Prohibition.